Lia Waugh Powell

Without a doubt, Facebook has impacted the lives of thousands upon thousands of people throughout the world.  Through Facebook we are able to connect with family members we haven’t seen for a while, meet long distant family members, share photographs with each other, create and organize events, and share what we are thinking with our friends.  All of those things have changed society; being able to communicate with people has never been easier.  However, people have found a way to make Facebook an unpleasant experience, and this article’s purpose is not to rant but to logically explain and dissect the purposes of people who do such things and offer a way for the people to fix the issues.

1.) Let’s start with the most annoying (in my personal opinion) example of one of Facebook’s annoyances: TBH, LBR.  For those who don’t have a Facebook account, TBH stands for “To be Honest” and LBR stands for “Let’s be Real.”  The essential purpose of this is for people to “like” a person’s status who has posted “TBH” or “LBR” and the person will write on the liker’s wall about what he/she thinks about that person.  It may seem like a fun idea, but it is never used the way it should be.  On average on my newsfeed (I did the math), 1 out of every 9 statuses is TBH or LBR, mostly from the same people, over and over again.  And every response to the TBH post can be summed up as this: “TBH (or LBR), you are really pretty.  We don’t talk that much but I wish we did, we should hang out some time, hit me up.”  This is annoying for numerous reasons.  One reason is because the writers do not really mean what they say.  If they truly missed that person, they would catch up with them, send them a message, text/call the person.  They would not write on their Facebook wall because the person liked their status.  Secondly, as mentioned earlier, these statuses are written by the same people almost every single time, and in response the same people like the status every time.  This harbinger could very well be because of a low self-esteem issue and should not be taken lightly.  Your self worth is not found through how many people like your status and how many people value your opinion.  The people who like your status only want to be told they are pretty and are missed.  Those people should not have to seek out attention through a social media website.  They should put more effort into their friends and family.  If you are a “TBH” liker, please know you do not have to be told constantly you are pretty and likeable.  Focus on other positive areas of your life.  Go out and help other people, because blessing other people will truly fill that void where you feel you are worthless.  You are God’s child; you are by no means worthless, but if you are constantly searching for affection through other people who do not truly care about you, you will continue to feel empty and will never reach the satisfaction you desire.  Your continual liking of TBH statuses proves this point; if it’s the third time you have liked the status and you still do not feel good about yourself, then you must know something is wrong.

2.) Another annoyance found on Facebook are those who upload pictures of themselves every day, and also those who change their profile picture at minimum once a week.  We all do in fact know what you look like.  I am not saying this out of acrimony, out of jealousy, or out of anything negative.  It is just a simple annoying factor of Facebook.  It not only gives off the aura of vanity, but also it seems as if the person is seeking attention.  Every person is unique and beautiful; if you believe you are more beautiful than someone else, you should check your heart, because that is not the humble heart Jesus teaches and calls us to have.  If the person is changing his profile picture constantly because he feels he is not beautiful and cannot find a good picture of himself, that is also wrong.  You should love how God created you, because you were made in His image.  And a Facebook profile picture or a new photo album does not determine your popularity status, and if it does I would suggest you change your group of friends.  Nobody should feel there is a standard to live up to in order to keep his or her friends.  Friends should love you for who you are, not what you look like.  In addition to that, “Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised” (Proverbs 31:30).  That is the character trait all people, not just women, should seek out, fearing God and honoring Him through your life — not seeking acceptance from other people and “likes” on a profile picture or status.

3.) Additionally, Facebook is not a showcase for when you are having relational problems.  It is already hard to accept when someone dates another person for two days and professes his or her love for the other on Facebook posts … daily.  There is nothing wrong with public displays of affection; they are in a sense sweet.  However, when the pair has only been dating for two days and throw around the word “love,” it honestly should upset people.  The modern idea of love is already corrupted, so when it is consistently abused further, it is disappointing, especially when the couple breaks up every three weeks.  You can always tell a couple is dysfunctional when it is obvious they are fighting because their Facebook status states, “ugh, I’m so upset.  I honestly can’t do this anymore.”  Nobody needs to know you and your significant other are fighting.  If you feel you are mature enough to handle a relationship — a true relationship — you need to act like it.  Relationships should not consist of constant public fights, and you should certainly not break up biweekly.  If that is the state of your relationship, you need to get out.  Relationships should be based on purity, friendship, and love.  God should always be first in your relationships, through prayer and accountability of one another.  In this day and age relationships have been transformed into two people who like each other, and consist of impure morals and unrealistic feelings.  Love is not a feeling; it is not butterflies in your stomachs: it’s a day-to-day choice the person you tell “I love you” to is your treasure.  Biblically, you are called to encourage and stay committed to that person regardless if he/she drives you insane.  “Love is patient; love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).  Therefore, switching your relationship status on Facebook to “in a relationship” to “it’s complicated” to “single” religiously is completely and utterly immature.  You should not be in a relationship.  Instead, strengthen your relationship with God.  Too often people have this preconception they need a significant other.  Yes, God calls us to have relationships with other people.  Men and women do in fact complete each other.  But that does not mean you always need to be in a relationship.  Nine times out of ten, you have something more important to be focusing on (such as deepening your relationship with Christ).  When God is the center of your life and after much prayer, if you feel God has called you to be in a relationship, then go about it in a righteous manner.  Respect your partner, encourage, love, and help him/her keep his/her eyes on God as well.  If you cannot commit to those things, you should not be in a relationship.

4.) Joining Facebook groups and liking a page will not cure world hunger, cancer, make a guy/girl like you, make you seem more interesting, give you more friends, or help you find a missing child.  Though all of those things might sound good, none will happen.  If you would truly like to help world hunger causes or other troubling issues, plenty of websites exists for you to donate to.  Get educated on the topic and go out and make a difference in this world.  I promise you hands-on experience is better and far more rewarding than liking a Facebook page or group.

5.) Let’s get one thing straight: no person cares if your turnips on Farmville are ready to be harvested.  And no, I do not want to be your neighbor on Farmville, either.  There is NO purpose to Farmville.  My news feed should not subsist of the thousands of notifications of your accomplishments on Farmville, Café World, or Mafia Worlds.  Maybe they are a way for you to relax and unwind, and maybe you think it is fun, but I do understand why people get caught up in them.  Please know there is an option for you not to publish everything onto your Facebook.

6.) Dear Mr. Ushman A’shd Umaya: I do not know you; I do not know how you found me, and though your profile picture of a Disney character is tantalizing, no, I do not want to be your friend.  That situation should suffice enough to annoy anyone.

7.) If you have updated your status more than three times within the past hour, please stop.  Facebook statuses are meant to share your thoughts (particularly interesting, funny, or encouraging ones).  I do not want to know if you are currently reading a book or are standing in line at Food Lion.  Pertaining to this subject, Facebook should not be used as a personal journal.  The world should not know if you are in a fight with your mom, if you just kissed a guy/girl; it should not be used for you to brag about how amazing you think you are, and it should not be used for you to write depressing statuses all the time.  There are so many good things in life, why should you waste time being depressed and sharing your depressed thoughts with others?  Talk to your friends in private if you are having issues, but try to spend your time encouraging other people rather than bringing them down.  When you bless other people, it is like instantaneous medicine for your soul.  “If you have a problem face it, do not Facebook it.”  Gossiping on the Web also should not occur (gossiping at all should not occur).  As of November 3^rd, Google expanded its searching realm, and your comments can be found on the Web if someone looks up your name now.  Arguing on Facebook should not occur, either.  It is juvenile and annoying to those who read the dispute (albeit it can be quite entertaining).  Your life issues should, once again, not clash on-line.  Confront the other person in an appropriate and private manner about the offense and move on with life.

In conclusion, your personal life should not be displayed for all to see through Facebook.  Most of these annoyances are based on that issue.  Confront your issues in mature manners and develop and establish social skills from the Bible.  God’s Word contains all the resources and wisdom you need to know to get through life, along with the people He has put in your life.  Facebook is not a journal, nor is it a healthy way for a person to seek attention.  A Facebook “like” should not and will not be as fulfilling as developing a genuine relationship with Christ and other people.